Ban jaane de woh phool jo tere baag kee shaan badha de.Kyun hota hai aksar yeh jeevan mein mere saath. . . Jab hoon tanhaa nahin de paata apna haath . . na koi hota sahara na koi puchta dobara.
Joojh joojh kar jab thak jaati hoon kissi ke saath ko taras jaati hoon . . Ghar aur dil ka kona soona aur khaali paati hoon. Kab hogi yeh tanhayee khatam? Kab milega mujhe mera punar janam. . .
Ya phir Milegi is jeevan raah mein tanhaiyaan.. badhaien .koi to mujhe bataade..
 Kyun hota hai aksar yeh jeevan mein mere saath. . . Jab hoon tanhaa nahin de paata apna haath . . na koi hota sahara na koi puchta dobara.

Joojh joojh kar jab thak jaati hoon kissi ke saath ko taras jaati hoon . . Ghar aur dil ka kona soona aur khaali paati hoon. Kab hogi yeh tanhayee khatam? Kab milega mujhe chain kab aayega sukoon....

Time stood still
.....she was waiting for me to say something... The toughest words in my life..words that just wouldn't get uttered. But my baby was waiting and i had to say it... Do this for her. For my Angel.i had to tell her to go.... To move on to her happy place.could there be a happier place for her than ours? Could she be happy anywhere else, Ever???
But i had to ...so I did .I had my Angel breathe her last in my arms i told her to go .go my bacha go to your happy place.....
Two years and millions of tears later now I have mustered courage to write to talk and open my wounds.. To say I miss her I love You Angel Paenjal like I love aanuu....You will always remain my baby .And
Now that I have given myself the freedom to think back on those two years , I also think what did I do so wrong to loose her thus!

She came to us as my daughter's third birthday gift from her maternal aunt.We were ecstatic about the bundle of joy we had .She blessed us for the next four and a half blissful years and took away all pain and sorrow and went her way after much suffering.
I wonder why such selfless acts are met with so much pain.I wonder why her going was necessary? I wonder what was the purpose of her short life ?was it to make us experience the joy she brought with her? Was it the lesson of life we had to learn from her? Am still searching and wondering.maybe someday like her ,i too can be an inspirational end or maybe she taught me to live in an inspired way......

To A dear friend

 When we first talked to each other I knew we would always be friends. Our friendship has kept on growing And I'll be here for you to the end. You listen when I have a problem And help dry the tears from my face. You take away my sorrow And put happiness in its place. We can't forget the fun we've had Laughing 'til our faces turn blue. Talking of things only we find funny People think we're insane-If they only knew! I guess this is my way of saying thanks For catching me when I fall......

mujhe jeene do

Soch  rahi thee raat ke andhare mein , dil ke akele mein .... Kya batora is safar mein, kya payaa kya khoya aaj is dagar pe?

Chahaa nahin kabhi koi haseen sapna, chahaa nahin koi kabhi bane apna.chahaa bas sukh dena,na kuckh maangna na kuch lena.

Kehete hai khuda hai ..kehte hain sabke liye khudha hai...kehte hai sabka apna khuda hai.... Hai toh kyun nahin jaanata kya hai meri nanhee khushiyaan ? Kyun ban kar reh jaati hai woh har dum siskiyaan???

Kab akhir kab main jee paoongee,dare bina sahmein bina main reh paoongee.Har ek hansi ka kub tuk doongi hisaab? Kab tuk milegi khushi mujhe odhe gum ka naqaab?

Kahin aisa na ho main thuk jaoon? Haar ke kahin main ruk jaaoon!     Mujhe jeena hai; suna khuda tumne ???? Mujhe jeene do ,haansee ke aakhir kuch toh pal batorne do ....kuch toh sukh sametne do..kuch toh pyaar paane do. Mujhe jeena hai bas MUJJHE jeene do!!!!!

Should I wait?

A thought just occured..Probably am freee to think so it came to me.. We talked a lot when we were younger .... We are runnnng in all different directions now..... Will probably want to talk a lot when we grow older.... Waiting to grow old fast then we can chat up like old times .....   A friend tells me"Dont think,catch up "! I tell her- maybe the ones i want to catch up with are already caught up!!!!!!

Summer's here

Been a long summer .... and still will be ... been a long time and still will be... missing my time.... and still willl ..... misssing life .... still will . when will the  journey  cease when will my moment arrive ... when will i stop a while ... when will i breathe and smile .....

 Seems like ages since i laughed , seems like ages since i  shared  a smile ... no friends , no family not even acquaintances ....   No partner ..... no neighborliness, no room mates  ,no one alive ?
  where have I  come to?what can i now do ? am i doomed this life of pain misery and loneliness or will i find some one who will be mine someday mine ?

morbid miserable thoughts shroud my life ,my heart is like torn apart by a knife ....  have i stopped thinking ? have i stopped living , have i stopped breathing , have i stopped being .......
 I think , therefore , I Am???

From Ma , with love

Soch rahi thee kaun hai woh jisne diya mujhe ek wajood . . Ma ne beti banaa kar ya beti ne maa banaa kar. . Joh bhi ho yeh ehsaas acha hai . . ma hoon ma se hoon . . . :-) happy mothers day:-) :-)